


as humans wont to do

by bukkunkun



Category: Devilman (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Attempted Seduction, Come Inflation, Dirty Talk, Don't Examine This Too Closely, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Extended Metaphors, F/F, Honestly This Is Awful, Introspection, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, No Plot/Plotless, Probably Very Sacrilegious, Rough Sex, Semi-Public Sex, Sexual Violence, Time Loop, Time Skips, Yes you read that right, bring your bibles and do the criss cross applesauce, you know what I honestly don't know what i was doing with this so just suffer with me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-18
Updated: 2018-01-18
Packaged: 2019-03-06 08:00:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13406910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bukkunkun/pseuds/bukkunkun
Summary: “I love you,” Satan weeps over death, too little too late, and the world starts over again for another time.lifetimes of mistakes and heartbreak, by Ryo Asuka.those who do not read history are doomed to repeat it.





	as humans wont to do

**Author's Note:**

> honestly hte bold text is a callout at myself, why the fuck am i still writing fanfiction, i'm retired god damn it but here it is anyway because i love my friends more than i hate myself.
> 
> this is incredibly messy and awful and i honestly tried way too hard to write metaphors so now we're all stuck here with this silly little thing i called "i'm sorry mother" on my gdoc that my thesis adviser called me out on. 
> 
> anyway thanks for sticking around here's your cum inflation kink size queen ryo asuka
> 
> promo my ass:
>
>> OwO what's this???? a thread [pic.twitter.com/ghKMWwImLY](https://t.co/ghKMWwImLY)
>> 
>> — bukkun @ fuckin a run for it (@trickscd) [12 January 2018](https://twitter.com/trickscd/status/951628797899505664?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw)

Men, as humans wont to do, never seem to learn.

It is the third Earth with twin moons, the twenty-third of many others, with or without moons.

He is beautiful as ever. Golden, eyes of cut glass. Tongue of a viper, the beautiful, iridescent adder of a being he is since the beginning of time.

He dons the white of his godly appointment, as if to fool even himself of the demon beneath.

Psycho Jenny is with him, and he remembers.

Sometimes, he doesn’t. This time, he does.

And yet how hard he tries—he tries, and tries, and tries.

Begs with the voice of angels singing praises to God, the sweetness of water flowing straight from a cut deep into mother nature’s bleeding breast. He lies like he has always done before, of salvation, of joy and freedom—he tells the truth like cards kept close to a gambler’s chest.

“I love you,” he says this lifetime, but it is not real. Not yet, not until it is too late.

The time between peace and the eventual spiral is faster than others when he remembers who he is. The time he wastes skirting around the truth is lost in favour of a high-paced, violent cascade of pain and fire, brimstone merging with sulfur and despair like the world was Hell itself.

The Devilman— _his_ Devilman, the monster of his own creation, with hideous claw-hands around his beating heart—dies with a missing pair of legs, as always, his arm—not always—and his tongue missing.

Their conversation stays the same, as God rains His power down on pitiful, burning rubble and sin, and time comes back, whip-sharp and cruel, for another lesson paid in seas of blood and enough tears to double that.

* * *

As beings created by God, every living thing has the right to be loved equally, preachers teach.

Prophets sing of mercy, of divine intervention and prayer, repentance. Of forgiveness and hope.

“Demons follow the word of false prophecy.”

In this lifetime, he chose a woman’s body. As if that will help.

In return, life gives her Akira Fudo as a woman as well. They hold hands, but mean different things.

Kisses shared are only so sweet to only one of them.

Her hair moves like shadows over her shoulders, and her eyes follow their movement, hot like the embers from hell.

“If that’s the case, then does God not love them? Do they not forgive nor have hope, or feel love?”

Satan looks into the eyes of Amon, and replies with venom on her tongue.

“Love is not real to them. Therefore, suffering is not real either. They feel; but not in the way humans do—they do not know mercy. They do not know love.”

The Devilman deflates, not in the way Satan does, and the world burns around them as it begins to fall apart.

* * *

“I love you,” Satan weeps over death, too little too late, and the world starts over again for another time.

* * *

“You know, sometimes, I think you know way too much about everything, Ryo.”

There is silence in the Asuka manor, and this time around, it is Ryo’s father who starts the cycle. Silently, above their heads, twin moons move along a path God had made them to follow, and Ryo peered at them, as if contemplating the lagging moon’s futile attempts to chase after its better half.

“I _am_ a professor.” He replies, nonchalant and easy, but Akira is already standing next to him, laughing softly, naked underneath a silk bathrobe.

“No, not like that.” He says, “You just… _know_ so much. It’s amazing.”

“What does that mean?” Ryo snaps, fully clothed, this time—in his hands rolled white gauze. “And what are you doing out of bed? I literally just put your arm back together.”

“Oh, sorry.” Akira’s laugh was soft, the sound of tinkling bells, and Ryo fell further in love. “I’ll go take a seat.”

He makes a show of rolling his eyes, but says not another word.

This was the last time they speak this casually, this quietly. Soon, Miki’s head will be on a pole again, and the world will burn with God’s gracious power.

* * *

“I knew.” Satan says, much, much later, in the aftermath of the world, in the deafening silence of the calm before God’s judgement. “I knew everything.”

His hand curls around somewhere he is used to holding, but it is not there. It is lost out there, somewhere, in the sea, thrashing orange and red with corpses demons and humans.

“But I did not know you. Not the way I wish I wanted to.”

* * *

In this lifetime, Akira loved Ryo, and Ryo had been too foolish to see it.

“Choose, Akira—live with me, or perish with her.”

There was hesitation in the Devilman, the breath of uncertainty, and something in Ryo’s chest turned uncomfortably sweetly when his hands lowered.

“Miki is important to me, but…”

The sensation felt like rats scurrying around in a tiny bucket, ready for slaughter. Mealworms writhing together. Maggots, undulating atop repugnant, rotting meat picked apart by birds.

Ryo _hated_ it.

“You’re more important to me, Ryo.” Akira’s eyes shone with tears. A crybaby—a beautiful, beautiful _human_ crybaby. “I like you. You’re so important to me.”

“Then come with me. Leave all this behind.”

“Am I important to you, Ryo? What is important to you?”

Demons could not love. They could not know compassion, or decide who or what is important to them.

Ryo was a demon, and pulled Akira into a bruising kiss that tasted of the blood that dripped down from their foreheads.

* * *

“32.”

“Huh?”

Akira looked adorable like that, an energy drink between his teeth, head cocked while stopping in the middle of tearing apart another roast chicken Jenny set down in front of him with a tiny snicker.

Ryo sat next to him at the dining table, his own plate of food (per Akira’s demands) still untouched, and looked at Akira with a fond smile. He tapped at the corner of his mouth, and the other young man jolted, wiping at the corner of his own mouth in confusion.

“The other side, Akira.” Ryo said patiently, and Akira laughed nervously, but did as he was told. “There.”

“Wait, what do you mean by 32?” Akira asked. “Is there something I’m missing?”

“Yes.” Ryo, this timeline, at least, was a little more honest than his other versions. It was this honesty that kept him from the hospital bed the day before, that kept Akira from the Makimura household from that day forth. “I finally understand. The world has been formed at least 32 times before.”

“What does _that_ mean?” Akira frowned, and Ryo shook his head, chuckling softly.

“How are your living arrangements? I hope they’re not too inconvenient.”

“Oh, uh.” Akira rubbed the back of his neck, “It’s nice. My room, it’s… uh.”

“You have a problem with something.”

Jenny raised an eyebrow—the first time she showed emotion that evening, and Akira blubbered in alarm.

“N-no! Not really a p-problem, uh!”

He deflated, and twiddled his thumbs. Ryo huffed softly in amusement—a young man as large as Akira, looking sheepish and twiddling his thumbs. It was oddly endearing.

“You’re wondering why we’re not sharing a room, after… that.”

Akira’s cheeks turned pink.

Ah, Satan thought with relief. A timeline when Devilman was more Akira than it was Amon.

“Yeah. Uh. That.” He said timidly, and Ryo nodded, just once.

“So you want to sleep with me.”

“Not like that!” Akira stammered, “Just, um,” He looked lost for words again, and Jenny didn’t understand Ryo’s patience for it. “I dunno. We’re… together, aren’t we? At least why not, um. Spend more time together?”

“Alright.” Ryo sighed, and much to Akira’s alarm, shut his laptop. The blond rested his chin on his hand and leaned far forward into Akira’s personal space, a tiny smirk playing on his lips while Akira gaped on in shock. “So,” he purred, “What is it you want to do?”

“I, I, um.”

Ryo’s hand came up to unbutton one, two buttons from his throat. Three, four, and smooth, smooth cotton slid down even smoother skin. Akira’s eyes, guided with Amon’s thirst, followed the curve of Ryo’s collarbone, the tendon in his throat.

“Tell me. I will deliver.”

Satan’s words slithered with sweetness, silk trailing across marble after the steps of some handsome, naive maiden. Sweet and alluring, like the words that swayed Eve to damn the rest of mankind into a life of sin and suffering.

Heat rose between them, and Ryo kept his gaze on Akira to pin him down. He was practically on the other’s lap, and he could feel a demon’s insatiable lust bleeding through the air, heady and thick.

Jenny was gone, thankfully.

“I made you like this, after all.” Ryo’s voice dropped into a purr, barely a whisper. “It’s my turn to give.”

“I—” Akira shook his head viciously, and instead took Ryo’s hand on his shirt, squeezing it tenderly. Ryo cocked his head, and Akira refused to meet his eyes. “Let me just—lemme just hold your hand.”

“Hold… my hand.” Ryo echoed, and Akira laughed nervously, cheeks on fire.

“Hold your hand.” He nodded, and it made so much sense.

Akira was a human, and pulled Ryo into a soft, tender kiss that tasted of roast chicken, and water turned into cheap wine.

* * *

“I made a choice, didn’t I?” Akira’s voice was weak. In hindsight, it probably always. With all the strenuous activities, and the pain, and the suffering, it somehow only made sense that he was always screaming.

It made it easy to forget how… _human_ Akira used to be.

“Not like this, never like this.” Satan was beautiful when he wept. Diamonds tumbled from eyes of cut glass, and his skin shimmered with the brightness of the stars and galaxies above their heads, far beyond reach.

“No. This is for you.” Akira’s hand trembled as he smeared his own blood on Satan’s cheeks. “Get away from here. While… while there’s still time.”

“Not without you,” Satan choked, “Not… not without you. I-I couldn’t start this without you.”

“But God will get you.”

“Then he will, and I will try again. Earth 33. 34. However many times it takes.”

Akira let out a long, tired sigh, and shut his eyes. “So that’s what you meant. Somehow, that makes sense.”

“Akira, please, don’t—”

“It’s too late for me.” Akira said slowly, as Amon began to fade away. “I can feel him disappearing. Soon, I’m gonna go too.”

“No, you can’t, you’re—”

A diamond tumbled out from tears, tumbling over Akira’s collarbones. Akira laughed quietly at the soft, tickling sensation.

“You’re important to me.” He said, the last of his breaths approaching. “Ryo.”

“You are also important to me,” Satan replied, barely too late this time, but he managed.

Akira smiled slowly, and died, as God’s judgement cast down upon the both of them.

* * *

And the world began anew.

* * *

“Let there be light.”

This timeline, two young women stepped into an empty apartment, weapons at the ready. Akira’s hand was deformed into her claws, and Ryo carried with her a gun half her weight. When they saw it was empty, the both of them calmed down, and Ryo put the safety back on her gun. Akira sighed deeply, and morphed her hand back to normal.

“Oh, that phrase sounds familiar.” She said pleasantly, turning to watch Ryo barricade the door.

“God. I’m quoting God.” The blonde replied flatly, and Akira pouted.

“Weird choice.” she commented, and sighed deeply. She took a look around—it was standard-fare enough, she and Ryo stood in a small living room, there was a kitchen off to the side, and further down the apartment were bedroom and bathroom doors. “Hey, Ryo—” She began, but as she turned around, the blonde pulled her into a bruising kiss.

She let out a muffled shout, but she let her push her back into a dusty couch, the blonde climbing on top of her without ever parting for breath.

Neither of them let up for air easily—Akira didn’t need to breathe that often, and there was something to Ryo that told her she was the same.

It wasn’t until Ryo was trying to tug off Akira’s shirt when they parted, letting her finally talk.

“Ryo? What’s wrong?”

“You saved my life.” She panted, and Akira smiled up at her gently.

“I had to,” She replied simply, and Ryo shook her head.

“You shouldn’t have.” Satan said, otherworldly, but only in a shaking, whispered breath as Akira’s hand found its way to her breasts. “You— _ngh_ —shouldn’t have.”

* * *

“I should have.” Akira’s tears shook her breath, and Satan’s eyes widened in shock and horror as a beam of bright white light cut her clean in half.

Satan’s world fell apart, crumbling into ashes as she shot forward to catch Akira before she fell, and Akira could only gape at her as light began to drain from her eyes like blood.

“I couldn’t—save you,” Akira choked, and Satan choked on her tears as they began to descend among the deafening silence of the war around them. “The baton, Miko, Miki, you—”

“Akira.” Satan breathed, unable to say anything else but her name. “ _Akira._ ”

“I should have.” She said weakly. “I… I’m… Devilman Lady.”

And then she was no longer anything, and Satan could only weep as her army of demons around her perished in the flames of God’s almighty justice.

* * *

“Men, as humans wont to do, never seem to learn.”

Ryo stopped in the middle of swirling his glass of water, looking up at Jenny, who stood next to him at the window, looking down at the shining lights of the night below them.

“Or women,” she continued. “So long as it is you.”

“Of all people.” Satan replied flatly, and went back to swirling the water. Slowly, it grew red, bleeding from the points his fingers made contact with the crystal holding it.

“You were destined to destroy the humans, and yet you fell in love with Akira Fudo.” She said, “Every. Single. Time. In whatever incarnation. No matter how far you two have been apart.”

“Demons have no hearts, Jenny.” Ryo said sharply, and the lesser demon bowed her head instinctively. “Love does not exist. Therefore, suffering does not exist either.”

“Does it.” She said, and turned away from him. “How many mistakes have I watched time and time again?”

Satan didn’t answer her.

“He does not love you.”

“Not this time, no.” Ryo replied, and the water was cheap wine. “But he can learn to.”

“His heart—”

“Who said anything about his heart?” Ryo’s smile was vicious, thirsty with the lust of a million demons. “It’s a muscle. Like the rest of the body, it can be trained.”

“How heartless.” Jenny huffed.

“Demons don’t have hearts, Jenny.” Satan lies, lies, and lies, he always, _always_ lies.

She knew, he knew. _Something_ beat inside all of them. Thump-thump-thump, the ebb and flow of blood, rushing systole, diastole.

The ebb and flow of life. Of emotion.

If there could be anger, there could be sorrow.

“Silene,” Jenny began, but Ryo shook his head.

“She’s a fool. Delusional and foolish, to bet on a winless risk like Amon.” Ryo finished his wine, and crushed the crystal between his dainty fingers.

“Akira will be arriving soon. And he will be hungry.”

“I shall prepare another meal, then.” Jenny, ever the loyal servant.

“No, not for that.” Ryo replied. “Of more carnal things than eating flesh and blood.”

“So you’ll fuck him?”

“More delicacy, Jenny, please.” Ryo was snickering. “But I’ll give the giant animal what no one else can.”

“Anyone else would break.” Jenny agreed, and Ryo’s grin was vicious. “Understood. I’ll take my leave for the evening.”

Where there was lust—

“ _Ryo!_ ”

There could be love.

Ryo gave Jenny a pointed look. “Giant animal,” he said nonchalantly, and Jenny gave him a bow.

“Good night, Lord Satan.”

* * *

They had fallen into a routine after that. An odd sort of exchange of services, where Akira would kill demons Ryo sent him after, and after that, Akira would do whatever Amon demanded him to do with Ryo’s willing, pliant body.

Tonight, the windows fogged up with stuttering breaths, and a demon paw pressed a tiny human hand into cold, unforgiving plexiglass.

“You can do better than that,” Ryo snarled through a dazed grin, locking his legs around Akira’s waist. The demon pinning him to his window snarled, and gave one strong snap of his hips against Ryo’s, grinding hard and unforgiving.

Ryo flinched through the pain. Preparation was almost minimal tonight, but he could will himself to take Akira. He was powerful—more powerful than any demon in existence—

It was _nothing_ to take the champion of Hell into him with no problems.

“Ah, shit,” Akira hissed through grit teeth. “I-I’m so, _fuck_ , sorry. I-I don’t know what…”

What came over him, he was going to say. Still cognisant of the world.

How unfortunate.

Ryo squeezed around him, pressing his hands down firmly on equally firm pectorals, giving them a teasing squeeze, and he could feel Akira swell inside him just that little bit more.

Akira’s voice melted into a cacophony of hellish demon growling. He let out a roar, and turned Ryo around on his lap to push his face into the window, hands hard and unforgiving on his slim, pale waist.

The sting of pain made pleasure rush through Ryo’s spine as Akira—Amon—ground his cock inside him deeper, _harder_ , it felt like it could bump the back of his throat with how far up inside him it was.

“ _Fuck, yes._ ” This was what he was waiting for.

Amon growled like tearing Akira’s throat into ribbons, and pulled out of him to give Ryo only a moment to breathe—a short, startling moment of brain-breaking clarity, before he slid right back inside in an unforgiving thrust. He choked on air, on the lack of it, and he could only hear a demon’s howling laughter as Akira plunged in and out of him again and again, his own weeping erection neglected as it bobbed against his stomach.

His cheek skidded on the window, slick with sweat and spit as all Ryo could do was gasp and hold still, letting Akira take control of everything from pulling his hips around with a bruising grip to pleasuring himself with Ryo’s entrance.

All of this was for him, after all. An exchange of services, a demon’s life for a fuck against a mattress, a wall, or in this case, a window looking right down into a busy road dozens of storeys below them.

There was no love here, only lust.

Raw, carnal and animalistic, there were no humans here—only demons.

This wasn’t love, Ryo knew, _felt_ it, as Akira came, searing-hot and incredibly _full_ , and he knew he was going to be poking at a softness at his belly that wasn’t there before.

God, he _loved_ this.

Ryo slumped against the glass, panting heavily, and he could feel Akira’s cock slide out of him, and his cum drip down from his twitching, abused hole.

His own erection still remained, twitching and angry as ever, but the window in front of him was smeared with white and clear, dripping fluid. A grin crossed Ryo’s face.

“Like I said before,” Amon snarled into his ear, sliding two claws over Ryo’s lips. The blond parted them easily, and they slid into him for him to eagerly suck on. “I’ll fuck you with his cock while the whole world watches.”

Ryo flinched at his words, and his cock gave an interested jerk.

“Of course you liked that, didn’t you, little whore?”

The erection inside him hadn’t died down yet. Ryo was aware of how much more stamina Akira had now as a Devilman, but it was only so much more prominent when they were having sex.

He was glad he managed to intercept him when he did—someone else could have been having this.

Let it be said that Ryo Asuka was never the type to like sharing.

Ryo nodded, unable to speak, and the demon behind him let out snarling laughter.

“Good. Let me fill you up nice and good.”

* * *

“You look pregnant. Did I really do that?” Akira asked, later, in the silence of Ryo’s room, the flashes of headlights from speeding race cars drag racing far beneath them like cameras recording some sin Ryo refused to acknowledge.

“Yes.” Content. He sounded full of contentment.

It sounded like fingernails on chalkboard, like a child screaming for its mother in the middle of a crowded Black Friday grocery.

He hated it.

Akira’s eyes were wide with wonder, human again, as he poked the small bump in Ryo’s stomach. The blond bit back a moan of pleasure that came with distension, and the sloshing of cum inside him.

“That’s… crazy.” Akira looked straight into his eyes, and something squirmed in his chest uncomfortably. “Ryo.”

“Akira.”

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly, “I’m… I’m never gentle, with you. It’s not fair to you.”

“It’s fine.” More than fine, really.

He was fine with whatever he could get.

( _Desperate._ )

His smile cut like a beacon in the dark. A Cheshire Cat, smiling down at lost little Alice. “I actually prefer it that way.”

* * *

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly. “I was never honest with you. I had only ever wanted your body, but your heart came along with it.”

Pure white fists curled on cracking, drying skin.

“Then the next thing I knew, I could feel my own inside me. Nevermind everything else.”

He squeezed his eyes shut. “I hated it. Time and time again, we came together and I never said a word. I hated it. I hated that I felt something, I hated that I kept coming back to it.”

He huffed quietly, and cupped his face in his shaking hands. “You’d say what I was doing was unhealthy. You’re caring and kind that way and I _hated it_. I hated it because I could never get enough of it.”

“I should have stopped when I could have. But I didn’t.”

He pressed a gentle kiss on parted, cold lips.

“Please, one more chance, I would beg, despite everything. Maybe next time I can get it right.”

Satan laughed dryly, and cradled Akira’s dead body in his arms tenderly, a facsimile of the Pieta that could have been so laughable if it wasn’t so pitiful.

He shut his eyes, as he always did, and waited for God to rain his judgement upon them once again.

“Because men, as humans wont to do, never seem to learn.”

**Author's Note:**

> devilman was fucking awful i absolutely loved it, a [livetweet](https://twitter.com/trickscd/status/951628797899505664) and [review by me over here on twitter](https://twitter.com/trickscd/status/951804667494723584).


End file.
